my reason was that i have been too caught up with piles of projects,assignments,tests that i left blogging to the very bottom of list to do's.

but tonight, at the most crucial moment before the most "scarystics test" tomorrow, the downfall decides to happen.

memories of 2 years of pain and dissapointment came flooding back.
the insults of immature 15 year old bitches that took away my confidence.
did you even for a tiny millisecond thought about how i would feel then?

but now, i couldnt care less if you've developed into a gorgeous young woman,

and might still be insulting me behind my back.

I, havent lost a pound off my fats.
Havent outgrew my strct curfews, havent yet found THE MAN.

but its okay, cos you know why?
YOUR "BOYFRIEND", the one you had an insecure "relationship" with..
yep THAT one..
...is being NICE to me.

and that is all that mattered.
everything going against YOUR words.
YOUR karma.

***

Dear God,
For all that you have given me, i thank YOU.
For all the tests that you put me through, i thank YOU.
Aku Redha.